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10. That sickly-sweet feeling of superiority
Somehow, Apple even manages to make brown splotches look good. I had food that looked like this back when I was single. It wasn't stylish. It was moldy.
Say what you will about Android pride, no one holds a candle to the Apple fanbois. Apple products have a je ne sais quoi, an intangible quality that makes them like no other. My Android device may feel decades more modern than my old iPhone 4S, but my iPhone 4S feels far more special. That said, I've had my fill of feeling special and I'm much happier with a spare battery, a replacement launcher, and a huge add-on memory card.
Image courtesy Apple (and possibly the insides of someone's fridge).