We'll replace Facebook with Shrek, says Dreamworks CEO

Is Dreamworks head Jeffrey Katzenberg serious when he says that on the web, 3D animation will replace the written word?

The creator of the world's most beloved ogre swears he isn't trolling us.

The creator of history's most beloved ogre swears he isn't trolling us.

Now that Dreamworks head Jeffrey Katzenberg has enriched the universe with no less than four Shrek movies and a musical, he had decided to cast his visionary gaze toward the horizons of social media, he recently told a crowd at the Technonomy conference in Tuscon, Arizona. Specifically, he wants to replace Facebook, Twitter, Google+, instant messages -- you name it.

As Tom Simonite reported for Technology Review, "Dreamworks 3D animation technology will be spun out to replace our text based world - e.g. this tweet - with an audio visual one."

The plan is as simple as it is devious.

Step 1. Dreamworks has partnered with Intel to make it possible to render the 5th through 11th Shrek films in real-time, rather than the minutes or hours previously required to create a single frame.

Step 2. This technology will trickle down to the consumer sector, where, presumably, boring black-and-white text will be replaced with 3D rendered avatars like the ones found in the Taiwanese news animations that helpfully explain the most important bits of celebrity gossip to those of us who don't have ten cats and a subscription to People.

Step 3. Profit!!!!1!

The only problem with this blueprint for internet domination is that humans evolved language for a reason, and the written word is such an incredible time-saver that leaving a voicemail rather than sending a text or email has become gauche. But perhaps Katzenberg knows something we don't -- especially about appealing to the lowest common denominator.

This post was originally published on Smartplanet.com

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