Why we don't talk anymore

Sorry, running late! Leaving soon, be there in 15!

We lie, of course, since it'll probably be at least another 30 minutes before we show up for an appointment that we're already super late for.

But text messages like these are now even more commonplace since, let's face it, it's so much easier to be sorry via a text message than in person.

That's probably why Britney Spears dumped her former husband via SMS, and more recently, why a U.K. company chose to fire its 16-year-old worker via Facebook.

It hardly seems legal, but sacking an employee through social media and SMS may in fact be within the boundaries of the law. A report we ran this week found that employment contracts typically require written notices to terminate employment and text-based messages sent via social media and SMS could be deemed as such.

But there are implications. Telling someone they've been fired via Facebook may not exactly be considered confidential, especially with the site's constantly-evolving privacy policies, and this can pave the way for the disgraced workers to initiate defamation lawsuits.

Also, who would be inclined to work for a company that is obviously lacking a "sensitivity chip", as Jennifer Aniston would probably say.

Yet, stories about couples breaking up over a simple text message are increasingly common and divorce via SMS is formally recognized in certain religious courts.

So, how did we end up in a society that now thinks nothing of drive-by apologies and breakups? To a large extent, we did ask for it, didn't we?

Businesses are constantly looking for ways to increase staff productivity and consumers always want better and faster ways to stay connected. To meet these demands, tech vendors have been more than eager to pump new online collaboration and communication tools, and we've gladly embraced them all.

Why shouldn't we? For all the shy souls and anti-social individuals out there, these communication devices offer a perfect platform to avoid physical contact without affecting their ability to work.

For some, the digital environment can bring out other sides of a personality that would otherwise have remained dormant and hidden from the physical world.

I remember chatting online one day with a university mate back in the mid-1990s over a telnet-based setup...no such thing as IM or even ICQ back then. She had remarked how different I seemed on text compared with when we conversed in person. It got to a point where she typed: "Is this really Eileen?"

The question seemed silly, but it was only then that I realized I would reveal my personal thoughts if given the opportunity to express them in written words. In person, surrounded by people, I was more likely to blend into the background and let others take over the conversation.

The nature of my job has since forced me to step out and face my fears, though there are still times when I would rather avoid eye contact.

But the point is the emergence of new communication tools, and now social networks, has allowed us to converse in ways we would never have been able to before.

It's highly ironic then that in our haste to develop tools that enable us to better communicate with our colleagues and friends, we've created an environment in which we have become less communicative.

Too often, I've seen diners at a table twiddling on their iPhones and BlackBerrys instead of actually having a conversation with their dinner companions. And when was the last you called a friend to wish her happy birthday instead of texting or leaving a message on her Facebook wall?

The crux of the problem is that while the digital world has afforded a great avenue for withdrawn personalities to show themselves for who they are, it has also provided others an easy way to shirk from having to deal with difficult and awkward situations.

And that's exactly why we have companies today choosing to fire their staff through Facebook, and husbands divorcing their wives via SMS.

Given a choice of two roads, wouldn't most of us choose the one less thorny?

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. ~ Robert Frost