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Topic: Social Enterprise

The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

Summary: I honestly have to say I was surprised at how universal the problem of Facebook fighting seems to be.

David Gewirtz

By for ZDNet Government |

It turns out my experiences are not unique. On Friday, I reported that different groups of my friends on Facebook have tended to pick fights with each other. I asked the question, "Does Facebook cause friends to fight?"

I was curious if my experiences were unique, because I have both very liberal friends and very conservative friends. While I'd never invite both sets to the same party, both groups can interact with each other on my Facebook page. They do, they disagree, and they tend to fight.

Apparently, ZDNet readers have similar experiences.

Reader "macadam" reports "It happens all the time." Regular gadfly reader "Ron Burgundy" reports, "Yep [they fight] and nothing makes me happier than to out an idiot liberal in a discussion." Reader "walterth3rd" talks about how a simple Facebook article posting caused him to lose a friend.

Still, other readers, like reader "Real Life" contend, "No, LIFE causes friends to fight." Reader "Duncan651" says the problem is really, "the lack of respect for another person". Reader "edkollin" tosses the problem right back in our hands here on ZDNet claiming, "ZDNet articles/commentary cause friends to fight."

My colleague Charles Cooper, over on CBSNews.com, agrees. Charles writes, "I can sympathize. Same thing has happened to yours truly as well as to friends of mine."

I also posted a poll and the results, based on 446 respondents are in. 62% report that Facebook does indeed cause friends to fight. By contrast, only 20% report that Facebook does not cause friends to fight. Sadly, some of our readers definitely need to get out more, because 18% selected "Pity me for I have no friends."

While a Web-based poll isn't strictly scientific, 442 respondents do provide a statistically significant dataset, which means I believe the poll results here are indicative of a larger and more universal Facebook friend fighting trend.

I honestly have to say I was surprised at how universal the problem of Facebook fighting seems to be. I thought that because I regularly cross deeply divided lines, my friends were somewhat unique. But apparently Facebook magnifies human nature, and it's our nature to feel strongly about certain topics and disagree with those who don't share our feelings.

Let's remember that one of the founding principles of America is that we're a diverse people with diverse beliefs. Diversity breeds disagreement, but civil discourse is essential to a civil society.

While we might disagree in person and therefore just as easily disagree on Facebook, let's try to keep it all in perspective, keep cool, and avoid fighting on Facebook, okay?

Topic: Social Enterprise

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22 comments
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  • These are not friends

    This just shows that you and the respondents have a diverse set of friends. I would think that anyone with more than 50 friends on Facebook would have at least 2 friends that don't share the same viewpoints. More than likely those 2 "friends" that are fighting don't even know each other.
    jhuddle
    Reply Vote

    • True

      @jhuddle
      But they could have some consideration for their mutual friend and not feud on his page.

      But as long as a significant minority regard political disagreements as a sign of moral depravity (or mental illness) and treat those who disagree with them accordingly, then the only way to solve the problem is for page owners to stop tolerating rudeness.
      John L. Ries
      Reply Vote

      • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

        @John L. Ries
        I'm not sure about that. If you post about a contraverisal, or polarizing topic, expect the sparks to fly. Why else would you post your views on a topic if you didn't want the feedback? Knowing that your friends have opposing views will ensure a heated debate.
        jhuddle
        Reply Vote

      • jhuddle: Heated debate is one thing

        Personal insults are another, The key is recognizing that intelligent, well informed, honest people can have significant differences of opinion on just about any subject, and that being wrong is not a character flaw.<br><br>Besides, courteous, civil discussion of the issues of the day strikes me as much more likely to change minds than is the usual invective.

        Edit: If you haven't read Benjamin Franklin's autobiography, I highly recommend it. Franklin had a lot to say about the advantages of civil discussion over dogmatic debate.
        John L. Ries
        Reply Vote

  • I wonder what the poll numbers would be...

    if applied to email instead of facebook. Probably not too much difference. It is human nature to fight, so any medium which facilitates communication makes it easier to fight.
    jasonp@...
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    It's not facebook. Throw those same people that are fighting into a room together and they'll fight all the same.
    Aerowind
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    There is a way that you can filter your status because I am into Sports but I have some friends who could care less about the Chicago Bears or the Los Angeles Lakers so all of my Bears fans are labeled so when I send a status about the Bears my non sports fan friends do not see my current status
    jt7928@...
    Reply Vote

  • I don't think these numbers really mean anything.

    Facebook is just a venue for their fighting, rather than a cause of their fighting. It's simply annoying because fighting on facebook is like having two of your friends fighting in your house, at a party you're hosting, so it's right out there for everyone to see and feel embarrassed witnessing.

    Have no pity for me, because I have no friends... on Facebook! Color me unsocial! :)
    D. W. Bierbaum
    Reply Vote

    • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

      @D. W. Bierbaum

      Right. Facebook doesn't tell people what to type or to press Send before considering what they're tossing out there. I will say that people are often bolder behind a keyboard than they tend to be face-to-face, but that's not Facebook's fault either.
      DainBramage1
      Reply Vote

  • Few friends, a heck of a lot of acquaintences

    Friends are people who you engage with mutual respect for, in spite of having a few differences in opinions. The majority of people on my Facebook friends list do not fall in that category. Being defriended by them causes me no angst.
    Dr_Zinj
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    I have finally blocked Facebook from my computer. I used it when my nephew was serving overseas because it was the way he kept people informed. Now that he is back, I blocked it to keep what should be halfway intelligent and polite adults out of it. The young teens act better than adults do.

    I have lost a nephew and his family to stupid facebook fighting. Email and Facebook cannot share emotion easily. But for some reason, people feel that writing negative things about another is okay. Things they would never say to the person on to anyone else. My nephew's mother and 20 year old sister decided to say negative things about his wife. Funny, when they were first together, they all got along wonderfully. Then they all went on Facebook.

    I think the concept was good, but human nature has made Facebook something that I will not use.

    Rowdie
    rrmiller13
    Reply Vote

  • While a Web-based poll isn&acirc;??t strictly scientific

    As someone who teaches the occasional statistics class to undergraduates, I would like to point out that this poll was NOT AT ALL scientific. The large number of respondents does NOT make it "a statistically significant dataset" (a statistically meaningless phrase; datasets are datasets, results can be "statistically significant" but these results are not because the sample is not representative.)
    urban-lurain
    Reply Vote

    • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

      @urban-lurain Don't confuse the discipline of statistics with that of sociology. For that matter, don't confuse the term "scientific" with the term "accurate". Statistics can be an analysis tool for polling and study, but does not stand on its own for data gathering. That said, because the respondents self-selected (as do most poll respondents) and they're on ZDNet, and they chose to read this article, they could well be biased in their response. Such is the case with lies, damned lies, and statistics.
      David Gewirtz
      Reply Vote

  • Facebook spunk

    And facebook is so worth fighting over. Really. I've seen more relationships go to pot because of it. It supports human hubris and paranoia. Amazing how a website can ruin lives. Or maybe life ruins the site....
    kdavislex@...
    Reply Vote

  • Ready to fight about fighting

    In your original article you spoke of isolating your friends from one another. Facebook is meant to be the antithesis of that. It's reopening a closed society in which the Limbaugh crowd only gathered with each other, and only a handful like yourself crossed boundaries. People are not longer skilled at discourse, because over the 20 years before the internet it HAD STOPPED HAPPENING.
    tkejlboom
    Reply Vote

  • Facebook, e-mail, etc.

    It is difficult to convey tone via written language. This results in a great deal of misunderstanding, Grasshopper. (Am I being condescending or humorous with that last?)
    cgilbert1
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    People and their attitudes toward life and each other cause fights, certainly, not websites or other forms of media. But just as fights are more likely to break out in a bar than in a cafe, some forms of interactive media are more likely to trigger those who are looking for a good row than others, and I'm certainly not surprised to find FB on that list of "more likely".

    Some folks enjoy fighting, and some don't. Those who do tend to take the opportunity whenever its offered and FB is just one of those opportunities. I don't use FB any more, but when I did, I didn't fight, nor did I add people to my list who were likely to. It's not my style. An associate of mine once explained to me that she positively loved "a good fight". I wonder if she's discovered FB?
    Trep Ford
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    Facebook don't make people to fight. People fight as well Guns don't kill people. People kill people.
    People are people. Some fight some don't
    ferdi64
    Reply Vote

  • RE: The numbers are in. 62% say Facebook DOES indeed cause friends to fight.

    I don't know about fighting - I haven't seen that.

    What FB seems to do is "dumb down" perfectly intelligent people when they join. Before I ditched FB (due largely to its attitude to privacy), two people I knew who undoubtedly fell into that intelligent category lost the plot. By that, I mean that rather than use it to post sensible stuff, they were reduced in a few weeks to "XXX is waiting for her fluffy-wuffy hubbie to come home, watching [fill in name of inane daytime TV programme] and eating chocolate buttons". OK, not quite like that: that's a bit sophisticated for the posts that I saw from them. One of them had gone on FB only because she had been appointed to teach kids about the dangers of the Internet. I talked her through registration and setting up decent privacy options, but in no time flat she was reduced to the drivel that categorises far too many FB posters :(
    michael_boardman@...
    Reply Vote

  • I don't it means what you think it means.

    [B]62% report that Facebook does indeed cause friends to fight[/B]

    In my experience, it doesn't matter whether on facebook, in person, via text, via email or whatever, some people simply have a personality that means they like to fight and argue and need "drama" in their life.

    So while I absolutely agree that Facebook is a conduit for "fights" to break out, I don't see it as increasing the frequency and I already know which folks are always doing the "cats and dogs" thing on a FB page and it is simply the way they are in "real life". :-D

    They don't argue on my pages anymore, I delete posts all the time nipping that crap in the bud.

    TripleII
    TripleII-21189418044173169409978279405827
    Reply Vote
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