Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

Summary: I've written a lot about Duke Nukem Forever here, so now that the game out it's only fair (and right) that I complete the record. Verdict - What a total and utter disappointment.

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TOPICS: Tech Industry
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I've written a lot about Duke Nukem Forever here, so now that the game out it's only fair (and right) that I complete the record. Verdict - What a total and utter disappointment.

I could say a lot about this game, but it would mostly consist of pointing out what's wrong with the game. The game is ultimately a first person shooter (and a pretty rough, tedious, linear FPS) that features Duke Nukem. There's some lip service paid to nostalgia and the heritage of Duke, but it's clumsily handled and quickly gets on your nerves.

I could say more. A lot more, but it's all just so depressing. There are a few gems within the game, but almost all of the good stuff is buried under tons of tedium, scripted events and cut-scenes. The graphics are indicative of a game that's been in development for twelve years, and while I didn't expect the graphics to awesome, I expected them to be better. The game is hobbled by being a console game shoehorned onto a PC. The map is horribly linear offering little or no replay value (and it's not like there's much there in the beginning). You're only allowed two weapons. And yeah, it's also pretty offensive, which was to be expected I guess, but the problem here isn't that it's offensive, it's the combination of unfunny and offensive that's the problem.

But maybe the worst criticism of all I have of Duke Nukem Forever is that it's a first-person SHOOTER game where you spend most of your time doing EVERYTHING BUT shoot at things.

I'm not sure who's to blame for this mess - 3D Realms, Tryptich Games, Gearbox, or just everyone involved. I don't even know if there's any point in having an autopsy. Maybe it's just a case of too many people being involved and too much time having elapsed since the last game. The Duke is dead on the slab and while the game hints at a sequel at the end, I really don't see that happening.

Rather than prattle on more about the game I'll leave you with TotalBiscuit's excellent three-part review of the game. This guy manages to not only offer up a decent review, but also riff the game and make it funny.

One final point before I go. While the game is indeed a mess, the way that the PR company that 2k Games hired to handle the PR, The Redner Group, then subsequently handled the bad press the game generated has also festered into a disaster almost as epic as the game itself. Tweets like this (now deleted) are highly unprofessional:

And then following this up with Tweets like this is just lame:

Bottom line - The game sucks. It is total and utter garbage. Don't waste your money on this horrible mess of a game. If you must have it for the nostalgia, at the very least wait until you can pick it up from the bargain bucket (which I expect it to be in pretty soon). I'd suggest spending no more than $5 on this junk.

It could have been such an awesome game.

I'm sorry I ever talked about it in the past ...

Note: I purchased my copy of Duke Nukem Forever, and didn't rely on a press freebie.

Topic: Tech Industry

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39 comments
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  • Its like backing a loaf of bread over a long period

    You start off with a really promising bit of dough, you're excited at the prospect of fresh bread and all the things you're going to be able to do with it.<br><br>The first baker turns off his oven and then it is passed over to another to continue baking. The same thing happens again and again until you eventually end up with a fully risen loaf but it tastes like sh*t. How nobody saw this coming is beyond me. <br><br>Literally the biggest waste of money in an IP purchase I have ever seen. Whoever it was at 2K games that thought it was a good idea definitely had their fanboi hat on instead of business hat on.
    Alansonit
    • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

      @Alansonit

      I think you're delusional in assuming that nobody saw this coming. Every true PC gamer saw this coming. The original Dukes were just as boring, linear, stale, pointless, mildly offensive, disappointing, and overall, unentertaining. Additionally, it's a general rule that anything that takes 10+ years to develop and actually sees the light of day, is terrible (excluding LOTR). It must be so long since some people played DN they forgot that it wasn't a good game. DNF was an urban legend, like Chinese Democry by GNR - guess what, that album blew horribly. So does this.
      jameel.aboulhosn@...
      • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

        @jameel.aboulhosn@... , actually I think it's the other way around. I think people are delusional for basing their opinion of the game on what they expect to happen, which most people tend to do. They sit around for over 10 years and then have made up expectations, and when those are not met, they give it 1 star reviews. Also DN was a good game, THAT is why it was hit when it came out even though it's graphics were only mid-level for that year. The real reason for most of the bad reviews is people just sit around waiting and waiting to bash it and expect it to do poorly. Sure there are some negatives, but by reading comments you'd think it was a giant turd. I see it as a really good, 4 star game.
        jzone
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    I like it. It is one of the games which don't score with ultimate graphics and shooting all the time like all other shooter games. The game has some cool slogans from Duke, some interaction with the environment to improve the ego. This makes the cool feeling of the game.
    IDontWantAUserName81
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Well, I guess this means Hardware 2.0 is about to be blacklisted by the developer...
    The one and only, Cylon Centurion
    • Ahh boo-hoo

      @Cylon Centurion ... I don't bother with free games any more anyhoo ...
      Adrian Kingsley-Hughes
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    God I miss 3DRealms... Bring back Shadow Warrior!
    Bates_
    • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

      @Bates_ I agree ...
      Adrian Kingsley-Hughes
      • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

        @Adrian Kingsley-Hughes I still play Terminal Velocity in DOSBox.
        Champ_Kind
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Was that an intentional typo on one of the last sentences?

    "It could have been SUCK an awesome game."
    jackdewey
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Wow, didn't think that ZDNet would pay any attention to the cynical brit. I thought ZDNet was opposed to quality material. At least that's the impression I've gotten from a lot of articles written in ZDNet.

    "And yeah, it?s also pretty offensive, which was to be expected I guess,"

    Yes, very much offensive. Which is why I'm not going to play it. And yes, if you know anything about Duke Nukem games, being offensive is what they're all about. Only reason I pay attention to the game at all is because it set a few records for vaporware and some people actually liked the original.
    CobraA1
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    You can't blame the time lapse between games for the poor quality and lack of fun - it was 10 years between Fallout 2 and Fallout 3, and that was a heck of a fun sequel.
    doodlius
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Just think. A few months ago ya'll were drooling abut the same game. Go figger.
    Charles_B
    • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

      @cboquin I know, I'm ashamed of that ...
      Adrian Kingsley-Hughes
      • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

        @Adrian Kingsley-Hughes I think you should be more ashamed of what you've written today. Anyone watching the 3rd video will wonder why you think its so bad. The gameplay video clearly shows good graphics and gameplay. I expect the poor reviews are really comments on the reviewers lamenting their lost childhood rather than the game and how nostalgia just aint what it used to be.

        You accused redner of being "highly unprofessional". The pot calling the kettle black?
        The Star King
  • It's a general theme...

    ...of things with "forever" in their title:

    Batman Forever
    Puff Daddy - Forever
    and
    Duke Nukem Forever

    If it has "forever" in the title, expect a big bag of suck.
    jmiller1978
    • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

      @jmiller1978 haha...thanks for the laugh, that was great! How true....
      ghalverson_z
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Sadly, another shining example of how the XBOX generation is killing legendary PC games. While early PC gaming gave us rich simulators, complicated wargames, FPS and RTS, consoles gave us Zelda. And yet it seems every new game is set to the lowest possible standard; basic controls on obsolete hardware in aging, non-upgradeable consoles. RIP Duke, you will be missed.
    SmokeMission
  • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

    Typo in the first sentence of the article.
    agency23
    • RE: Duke Nukem Forever ... What a disappointment

      @agency23 <br><br>I know, it's as if there is an anti-editor running wild at ZDNet. I cannot believe professional writers are making this many grammar errors and typos. (I have better grammar and I ignored most of English class for 12 years.) This has to be a major screw up in post production. It isn't just this site either, but this site seems to be worse than most. Maybe instead of importing the writer's text, they are printing it and scanning it in with 15 year old OCR software on a Win'95 system. Best explanation I can think of.<br><br>By the way, back to the OP. I will still play DNF, but not till it is in the discount rack. There are a lot of games that are not great games, but are still great fun!
      mlashinsky@...