Bah humbug: Stop sending Seasons Greetings spam

Are you getting too much holiday spam from your friends and associates? So is our own David Gewirtz, who lets loose with a particularly cranky rant. So much for holiday cheer.


It has begun. Deep within the many uniquely annoying rituals of the silly season is one particularly useless and even more annoying ritual: the content-free Seasons Greeting letter.

You've all gotten them. Insurance agents seem to love them, as do other professional services providers. They're e-greeting cards or simple emails telling you that you are remembered at the holiday season and wishing you and yours a good year. This is clearly a humbug. They added me to their list ages ago. They are not thinking of me fondly and dropping a line.

These things are starting to fill my email box. They blast through spam filters because I don't want to block otherwise legitimate messages from my insurance agent, my air conditioning contractor, my accountant, the guy who cleans my gutters, and all the rest.

Unlike normal promotional emails, which at least offer a discount or a special deal, the Seasons Greetings spam message is usually nothing but a "hiya, how are ya" sort of message. Zero content. Zero discounts.

Now, I'll tell you. The guy who installed my fence (who knew of installing fences, but now I have one) charged me more than it costs to buy one of those fancy new Mac Pros. I am still paying off that fence. I don't need a Seasons Greetings email from my fence contractor. I know he exists. He doesn't need to rub it in. I'm writing the checks.

You want me to feel holiday cheer? Cut 10% off what I still owe you. I'll even send you a fruit cake in return.

I know I sound all "Bah humbug," but these things waste my time. I get ten or more of these a day, and I have to dig through and delete them. So not only are these fools not making me feel all warm and fuzzy to them, they're giving me little homework projects for each message they send.

Don't even get me started on the guy who sends out his "Twelve Days of Email" Seasons Greeting messages each year. I need to take a deep breath and count to ten.

Yes. Yes, I do feel better now. Thanks for asking.

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