News Schmooze: Lamp-like iGadget rings in the new year

Here it is, 2002, and the Schmoozer was expecting video phones and shuttle tickets to the moon for Christmas. Instead, what do we get but a sort of odd-looking table lamp of a computer attached to a half-volleyball, courtesy of Steve Jobs. And a couple of weeks late for Santa, too.

Flat-panel iMac pictures leaked

One would have thought that at least this year's CES would come through with some futuristic booty, but instead it's looking more like Comdex all the time. Better by far was the International Auto Show in Detroit, where you could take a gander at Microsoft's latest Windows-powered car. Besides being .Net-enabled, it takes five minutes to start up and gets totalled only once or twice a week.

Accenture and Microsoft drive forward on auto gadgets

And careful drivers will also be pleased to note that hackers have now worked out how to crack .Net. Maybe they could offer helpful driving tips or mischievously rearrange the driving controls during the night.

Virus writers take an early crack at .Net

On the other hand, hackers everywhere must be cowering in fear after the guy who created DeCSS, the DVD cracking software, was indicted in Norway at the behest of Hollywood movie studios. To make sure those nasty vermin of the Internet are really deterred, however, it might be necessary to make the penalty a bit more serious... maybe DeCSS hackers could be torn apart by lions in a crowded arena, thus also creating possibilities for a tie-in with Gladiator...

DVD cracker indicted for DeCSS program

The News Schmooze is ZDNet UK's irreverent take on the week's news. Send your tip-offs to: mailroomuk@zdnet.com.

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