Vonage and phone sex: there IS a connection!

No, I'm serious.I just came across a February 8 press release from Vonage Canada with findings that would attest to the assertion made in this post's title.

phonesex.jpg

No, I'm serious.

I just came across a February 8 press release from Vonage Canada with findings that would attest to the assertion made in this post's title.

According to a survey of 1,015 Canadians 18 years or older conducted by  Decima Research on behalf of Vonage Canada:

"Canadians love to make love on the phone, and consider it an important part of a long-distance relationship, according to the survey. More than half of us (53 per cent) have engaged in 'phone sex' with a close friend or partner," the press release says. "And nearly half of us (43 per cent) consider 'phone sex' to be very important in a long-distance relationship."

Reading on- and I am serious here people, 39 percent of respondents said a successful "intimate phone call" involved "imagination." Uh-huh.

That ever-loving production value was followed by "receptiveness," with 31 percent, "creativity" with 30 percent, and "vocalization" with 25 percent. Some 20 percent of respondents also said that for such exchanges, having a hands-free phone is a must.

I know what you are thinking. I won't even go there.

For a more dispassionate, um, "hands-off" view, it is time to bring in the social scientists.

"To help compensate for the absence of physical interaction, racy conversations, leaving sexy voicemail messages, sending cards with sexy notes and enjoying conversations about everyday life are all good ways to sustain a long distance relationship," the press release quotes Clare Mezes, a Toronto-based sex therapist with the Ontario Association of Marriage and Family Therapy.

So what's Vonage Canada's angle in all of this? Something to the effect of intimate phone conversations are likely to be lengthy (oh, shaddup) and conducting these exchanges over a flat-rate calling plan like Vonage's rather than through a standard, bill-by-the-minute traditional phone connection is a more economical choice.

"Long-distance relationships have become unavoidable as more people relocate to attend post-secondary school and to take new jobs," said Vonage Canada's director of marketing and communications Patti Jordan.

"We're just happy to be able to do our part to help keep relationships healthy and happy without breaking the bank, but what people say and do during their conversations is really none of our business."