With the release of Apple iPhone OS 3.0, a widespread affliction has become a true, World Health Organisation recognised pandemic. I speak, of course, of the almost eroticised fetishisation that many iPhone owners have for their hardware: it is not too far away from paraphilia when they stroke, coo, gaze lovingly upon and even talk to their devices (and no, not during voice telephony).
Many of my nearest and dearest have fallen foul of this unpleasant affliction. But to get it accepted as a proper condition - and thus start the long, difficult process of finding and applying a cure - it needs a name.
But what to name it? Where could I find a suitable concentration of deeply disturbed yet intelligent people, who would understand what I was saying only too well?
Twitter, of course (where I'm @rupertg) . So I asked for suggestions...
You're a creative lot! Here's the current crop:
* iPhreaks @shadowfax1804 * Massive Losers @katiesol * Begins with W, ends with kers - @FrasSmith * Autoerotic technophilia @fgalv * iPhurries @nickhide * iSpods @liquidindian * iPhonlies @Vibrosies * Multi-touched @mikejaydavies * iParaphilia @sebFlyte * Maybe it starts with "lo" and ends with "sers". iPhonitism is quite strange, even for a fetish... @jackschofield * The word for such users is 'Hello' @WGallagher
Me, I go for malaphilia, from mala, which is latin for apple, also malus which is latin for evil (although @RobBuckley says that it should be milophilia to be true to the Greek, you don't get that nice Apple=Evil effect).