Coop's Corner: In the realm of the surreal

And now prepare yourself for a detour into the realm of the surreal: In response to my Jan. 12 column describing my earlier participation in the Ziff-Davis skunkworks project Interchange, we got a three-page letter from Lockheed's attorneys outlining in excruciating detail the history of the company's use of the term "skunk works" and its ownership of the phrase. I was tempted to reply "Skunk Works, Skunk Works, Skunk Works," but my lawyers advised me not to do it unless I also added, "Skunk Works is a registered service mark of Lockheed Martin. Therefore, let me say that Skunk Works is a registered service mark of Lockheed Martin, Skunk Works is a registered service mark of Lockheed Martin, Skunk Works is a registered service mark of Lockheed Martin."

This is the start of Microsoft's three day Windows 2000 smoke-a-thon in San Francisco. But beyond the orchestrated kumbaya sessions -- including cameos from industry bigwigs Michael Dell of Dell and Compaq's Michael Capellas -- you need to seriously question whether Windows 2000 missed the tech revolution? To be sure, the product may have been considered cutting-edge had it arrived in the market two years ago. But repeated delays have cost Microsoft dearly in the coin of technological comparison; the fact of the matter is that Windows 2000 is no longer a cutting-edge product. Formidable perhaps, but revolutionary? Not on your life. And no amount of PR spin can soften that indelible point.

Serious smooching up of Microsoft by Dell Computer. Following the lead of his boss' morning keynote, Carl Everett, senior veep of the company's personal systems group, told me Win2000 is "the most important operating environment we'll have in the PC space for the next five years." Nobody ever accused Carl of being prone to understatement.

More interesting is Everett's disclosure that Dell believes it can up the amount of business it does online from 50 percent of total revenue to around 75 percent by the end of the year. Unlike Compaq, IBM and the rest of the older-line computer makers, who are struggling to rejigger their infrastructures, this is a no-brainer for a direct vendor like Dell.

Whether anything substantive comes out of today's talk-a-thon about cyber security is anyone's guess. Don't forget that the administration in January proposed a plan to protect the nation's information systems infrastructure -- replete with objectives and a timetable. Ah well, it's a good opportunity for a big photo in tomorrow morning's newspapers.

Looked at from another vantage point, though, the Washington summit is just one more signpost of how quickly the cyber frontier is getting settled. The interests of business and government dovetail on the question of creating a codified, regulated Internet. (Consider, for example, the widespread existence of auction fraud on the Internet and the concomitant FTC response.) We're already leagues away from the wild and wooly region that was so sparsely populated as recently as 1994.

As a new DSL user, I can attest to the palpable advantages it offers over a plain old dial-up connection. But did the computer industry pawn off a bill of goods about the supposed ease of use -- not to mention the security -- involved in the installation and support of this broadband contender? You have to wonder. And now there is growing criticism that the hype got in front of the reality. That must be music to Mike Armstrong's ears.

Speaking of things aural, yours truly is getting an earful from folks who don't cotton to my ideas about the utter lack of redeeming social behavior in the sociopaths who call themselves white-hat hackers. Meanwhile, Mixter keeps dropping hints he plans to come out of the cold and talk to the authorities. All the while, the hunt for the culprit(s?) in last week's Web attack picks up speed. Sounds like the makings of a plot for the next LeCarre novel.

Was great to run into David Seuss, who old-timers may remember was the CEO of Spinnaker Software (later sold to SoftKey). These days Seuss runs Northern Light, a company with arguably the best search engine around. Northern Light, which just closed on a round of financing -- all told, they've raised $95 million -- is preparing for an IPO later in the year. This should be a hot one. Looking back over the last decade and a half, Seuss is astounded at how bad user interfaces have become. "Especially compared to what we had been working on in the '80s," he says. "We worked so long to make common user guidelines on software, and then all that got thrown out when the Web came along."