Star Wars and star-crossed lovers
It's the old story. Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, girl likes boy. The future looks rosy.
But then comes the tragedy. The girl makes a terrible discovery, which reveals he's not the man she thought he was.
Yes, he's a secret PC enthusiast. And she's a Mac loyalist. It can never work: they're just not compatible.
It's a tale of tech-crossed lovers that is repeated across the world, every day. Apparently.
For some Apple fans, allegiance to their manufacturer of choice is so strong that it affects not just how they spend their money (one million iPads have been sold already ) but also who they want to date.
You may ask how we can stop such heartbreak. The Round-Up is very glad you asked, because an answer could be on its way.
Cupidtino (the Round-Up can hear you groaning at that one) is a new service that could help you meet your dream Apple fanboi or girl.
In its own words: "Cupidtino is a beautiful new dating site created for fans of Apple products by fans of Apple products! Why? Diehard Mac and Apple fans often have a lot in common – personalities, creative professions, a similar sense of style and aesthetics, and of course a love for technology.
"We believe these are enough reasons for two people to meet and fall in love, and so we created the first Mac-inspired dating site to help you find other Machearts around you."
Cupidtino says it will launch in June and, wouldn't you know it, the service is available exclusively via Apple technology - iPhone, iPad apps and Safari. Think of the advantages. Guaranteed compatibility. The chance to get your hand on their elegant, curvy exterior and be sure that it the relationship won't be a Flash in the pan (there's more on Apple versus Flash here) . The chance to while away the hours discussing iPhone and iPad apps without your loved one's eyes glazing over. Bliss.
So for any lovelorn Mac addicts out there, the Round-Up would like to donate the following chat up lines, which may be of some use in luring the Apple-obsessed love of your life. Or maybe not.
How about: Baby, you're the Apple of my eye(Pod)
Or: Let's go back to my place and Mac beautiful music together (using GarageBand)
And if that doesn't work, you could always try: Come here and let me distort your reality field…
So good luck to Cupidtino with its fruit-flavoured matchmaking venture. Let's hope it's a success and inspires others to open a dating site for Linux enthusiasts.
Something tells the Round-Up that they'd need it more than the Mac users...
The Round-Up spent most of its childhood - and still spends a fair bit of its adulthood - obsessing about Star Wars.
There was exhilaration at the Battle of Yavin, terror on icy Hoth, Princess Leia in that bikini on Tatooine and, finally, glorious victory above Endor.
After a gap of many, many years, it was followed with the bitter disappointment of the prequels. But now there's a new hope for the Star Wars geek - a Darth Vader voice for the TomTom.
So if your car journey started a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away and you are still no nearer to your destination, then maybe you too could benefit from some directional advice from the Dark Lord of the Sith.
According to the TomTom website: "Lord Vader commands you to turn to the Dark Side. Will you be able to resist as he guides you to your destination? Obi-Wan has taught you well but now it is time to choose your path."
Launched earlier this week on International Star Wars day, which falls on 4 May (May the fourth be with you, geddit?) - Darth (or should that be Mr Vader?) joins a number of celebrity voices available.
The voice intones messages such as: "Bear left, to the Dark Side. Then in 200 yards you have reached your destination. The Force is with you, but you are not a Jedi yet."
According to some samples on the website, Lord Vader starts a journey with: "Depart. Your destiny lies with me. Obi-wan knew this to be true."
The add-on also has the rather inspired: "Left turn ahead, then go around the roundabout. The circle is now complete - Sith exit."
If Darth Vader is too unnerving a presence for your Mondeo Falcon then don't despair, there are more Star Wars voices arriving later this year, including C-3PO, Yoda and Han Solo.
There are no previews or details available for these voices but the Round-Up has a few ideas.
C-3PO: "You have missed your left turn. This is all your fault."
Yoda: "Turning? Passed your exit you have - Me-he-he-he."
And finally, Han Solo: "Great parking kid, that was one in a million, now let's lock this thing and go home..."
In less surprising news this week, a survey has discovered that people are more aggressive on the phone than in person. After all, it's far safer to call someone a mindless jerk on the blower on a different continent than it is to say it face-to-face.
According to the survey (by a mobile phone company, naturally) 78 per cent of people admit to being more confrontational on the phone than they would ever be in person.
People tend to be more abrupt on mobiles than they are face-to-face, probably because in real life you can't press a little button to end the conversation and make someone disappear.
And when asked, 'are you more likely to lie over the phone than you would be face-to-face?' more than half (57 per cent) answered yes.
Survey respondents were also asked who they were most likely to be rude to over the phone that they wouldn't usually be confrontational to in person.
Just under 40 per cent said it would be their parents feeling the brunt of their phone rage, whilst 56 per cent said it was often customer service advisors in call centres, according to the survey commissioned by rightmobilephone.co.uk.
The research doesn't reveal the percentage of people who experience 'phone rage' while acting as a call centre customer services advisor for their parents but the Round-Up's guessing it's pretty high.
In other news this week:
Find out what happened when our resident Apple columnist spent 30 furtive minutes with an iPad here.
Meanwhile, if you're wondering how the technology of the future will fit into your home next year, you're in luck. Have some pictures.
And as ever, check out the stories below as specially chosen by the Round-Up for you.