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Samsung reveals the inner depths of the Galaxy S22 Ultra (and it's weird)

Ever since the launch of Samsung's latest, biggest and greatest new phone, you may have wondered about one aspect. Now Samsung offers the definitive answer as it what it really says.
Written by Chris Matyszczyk, Contributing Writer

What do you see?

Chris Matyszczyk

It's been bugging me.

The minute Samsung revealed its new Galaxy S22 Ultra -- or, as some might prefer it, the S22 Notra -- all I could see were the cameras.

At first, it seemed like they'd been laid out someone who was sick and tired of laying out cameras on the backs of phones.

How many this time? Five? What am I supposed to do with all that?

I confess I was mesmerized. I know that many people -- pitifully, most people -- will embrace their S22 Ultra in a case. This will have a cut-out section for the cameras.

And, if you focus, you might see the letter F or the letter P, I already do.

Which made me wonder why they didn't just think a little longer and organize the cameras into the letter S or perhaps G or even U.

Anything that has a relationship with the brand name.

Also: The painful shame of owning an Android phone

I concluded that, yes, the camera layout person was just tired of it all. Until that is, I noticed Samsung giving its cameras a completely new significance.

Here, you see, is an ad from Samsung's German arm that made me think, um, different.

It's all about the cameras, of course. But it doesn't dwell on their arrangement. It features their shape and what it means for your pet spider. Everyone has a pet spider, right?

The spider in this ad spends its days looking out of an apartment window. It's not a perfect life, but it's not so bad.

One day, though, the spider looks out the window and sees a kindred spirit.

There's a Galaxy S22 Ultra billboard outside. And, well, those eyes. I mean, those cameras.

We're talking about a spider here. It doesn't even know what a phone is. But it knows beautiful spider eyes, especially when its owner is seductively lying on its side. On a billboard.

The spider is instantly in love. 

It hangs out, as only a spider can, desperate to get closer to its new love.

But love can hurt. One day, the spider looks out of the window and sees a new inducement is covering over the billboard.

This is a desperate hell. This is the end.

That very same day, the doorbell rings. Spiders have very good ears, and our hero wonders what -- or even who -- might have arrived.

The spider sees its owner take a box from a delivery person.

It couldn't be, could it? It cannot be, can it?

Yes, billboard advertising truly works, for the spider's owner has ordered a Galaxy S22 Ultra for himself.

Uncontrolled bliss has arrived. The spider's owner immediately takes pictures with his new phone, pictures of the spider. Those eyes are staring as they're capturing.

The Galaxy S22 Ultra is then left right next to the spider's little transparent home.

The message is clear, too. Don't think about an F or a P; think about the S22 Ultra's cameras as being spider eyes.

I love it when a problem is solved.

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