Who needs people?
They annoy us. They cheat us. They lie to us. And the number of times they let us down? Oh, don't get me started.
Thankfully, we now have technology that can pretend it's human. And, in Google's case, pretend very well.
Also: Google Home review: A great smart speaker CNET
How apposite, then, that Google has just released a new ad that recreates Macaulay Culkin's famous adventures in Home Alone, the movie where parents have somehow forgotten their child. Typical human behavior.
Culkin, though, is 38 years old. And my, how he's grown.
Well, not entirely.
He still lives with his parents, apparently. He still likes to jump up and down on his bed too, though his back is playing him up with ferocity.
What's different now, though, is that he has Google's Assistant on so many devices, including Google Home.
What fun it is to talk to them all. Sometimes, it must be hard to know which one to choose to talk to, so that the others don't get jealous.
After all, these marvelous machines pander to his every whim, including ordering pizza, creating the perfect room temperature and even create a security system that uses, for reasons that remain bizarre, a life-size cutout of Golden State Warriors star Kevin Durant.
I'm a Warriors fan, but is Durant the first person I'd want to protect me in a fight? I fear that might be Draymond Green.
Still, it's all cleverly done and suitably Christmassy.
It's also, though, a portent for our future. Is it possible that these devices will make it much easier to live alone?
Also: Google Home: A cheat sheet TechRepublic
Will we crave human company less, as our devices take the weight off our shoulders, before putting it onto our stomachs by ordering pizza?
A compelling recent music video worried that these devices would get to know us so well that it would be a little too well. Soon, they won't be pandering to us, but controlling us.
Perhaps that's what will make us happy, though. Just imagine how relaxed and self-absorbing life will be.
Previous and related coverage:
Google's answer to the Amazon Echo isn't perfect, but it's the best in its class.
A smart speaker that's large and in charge.